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The Story of Adam and Eve's Pets
Adam
and Eve said, 'Lord, when we were in the garden, you walked with
us every day. Now we do not see you any more. We are lonesome
here, and it is difficult for us to remember how much you love
us.'
And
God said, I will create a companion for you that will be with
you and who will be a reflection of my love for you, so that you
will love me even when you cannot see me. Regardless of how selfish
or childish or unlovable you may be, this new companion will accept
you as you are and will love you as I do, in spite of yourselves.'
And God created a new animal to be a companion for Adam and Eve.
And it was a good animal and God was pleased.
And the new animal was pleased to be with Adam and Eve
and he wagged his tail.
And Adam said, 'Lord, I have already named all the animals in
the Kingdom and I cannot think of a name for this new animal.'
And God said, 'I have created this new animal to be a reflection
of my love for you, his name will be a reflection of my own name,
and you will call him DOG.'
And Dog lived with Adam and Eve and was a companion to
them and loved them.
And they were comforted.
And God was pleased.
And Dog was content and wagged his tail.
After a while, it came to pass that an angel came to the Lord
and said, 'Lord, Adam and Eve have become filled with pride. They
strut and preen like peacocks and they believe they are worthy
of adoration. Dog has indeed taught them that they are loved,
but perhaps too well.'
And God said, I will create for them a companion who will be with
them and who will see them as they are. The companion will remind
them of their limitations, so they will know that they are not
always worthy of adoration.'
And God created CAT to be a companion to Adam and Eve.
And Cat would not obey them. And when Adam and Eve gazed into
Cat's eyes, they were reminded that they were not the supreme
beings.
And Adam and Eve learned humility.
And they were greatly improved.
And God was pleased.
And Dog was happy.
And Cat...
didn't give a shit one way or the other.
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